Videogame Movies

I'm sure that I am not the first one to notice comic book properties being bought up left and right by major studios and such. After they desecrate every last title we and our parents loved as kids, where will they prey next? Well, it already has begun, the era of movies based on video games.

I will state, for the record, that there are some gems in the mix. The original Superman movies are classic and while not the greatest series of movies ever made, have a certain flare to them. At the very least, they were better than the most recent feature based on the boy from Crypton. Spiderman, if you are a fan of Sam Raimi, was fantastic. If you are not a fan of his directing, there was a level of satisfaction that hit most of us when the translation of comic panels to camera movements was so fluently accomplished. Yes, despite Tobey Maguire not being my first pick for Peter Parker, the cast was well selected and the story was relatively accurate, considering that the adaptation from the pages to the reel can give the producers more liberties with the order of events.

Having said these things, on to a subject very dear to my heart.

The number one movie that old school gamers want to see is unarguably the Legend of Zelda. Although there has been no talk about a script or any plan for such a film, many have discussed the possibilities. With such a potentially large cast of characters, the whole mythology behind the series, an already proven method to present a large, fictional world to the audience (thank you LOTR special effects team), so many different dipictions of the main characters (Link can have any color hair, from brown to blonde to pink, I don't care!) and the most recent title for the Wii proving that link can be a badass, this game is ripe for the pickins. Just for the record, Orlando Bloom cannot and must not play the lead role. Link may not be super slick or mega buff but he is not a pussy. Even if Troy was never made, I have never liked him and regardless of how similar Legolas is to Link, it wont work in my mind.

While there has been no talk of a Zelda movie in the making, there have been some rather disturbing images of a Metroid movie. Now, if you are reading this blog and by some act of God have a major part in the making of movies, more specifically movies based on videogames - and even more specifically, a Metroid movie - listen very closely. I have some suggestions to make.

1) Samus will be Japanese and her hair unnatural in color.

The game was created in Japan, therefore it is only fair to have a Japanese girl play Samus. Also, her hair green, red, orange or pink, because that would be more appropriate for a bounty hunter, not to mention, she was raised by a bird-like race of beings called the Chozo and infused with their DNA which might lend itself to a few non-human physical characteristics. However, wings would take away from her attractive, female body and face, so the hair is the best catalyst to represent her alien side.

2) Samus' power suit will not be as armor, but as a biosuit, exact in appearance to and operating exactly like this, as designed and drawn by Torokun.
The suit was, in fact, designed by the Chozo, so must operate in ways we do not understand but seem to make sense in observation. Also, if her suit were armorlike, it would be comparable to the design of the GFP Trooper uniform (who must also be in the movie, for the record), and it would take away from the mystery of the morph ball. It would also help to have a bio-mechanical-physicist on the special effects team to invent a way for the morph ball to work.

3) Mother brain must not be in the movie; save her for one of the sequels.
While [she] is a key character in Metroid and Super Metroid, information from the more recent Metroid Prime 3: Corruption has officially opened up the box of ideas concerning the developement of and the events leading up to the first encounter between Samus and Mother Brain. With the Aurora Unit unveiled, there are far too many ways for Mother Brain to come into existence to just throw her in the first Metroid movie. There are other reasons.

4) The name of this movie will be Metroid: Origins, and will pre-date the storyline from all games thus far made.
A sequal would make no sense. While we have been given prequals to the first games released, the Prime series, we still learn nothing of Samus and her past. There must be included a history of the personal life of Samus herself as well as the formation, operation and various missions of the Galaxy Federation Police. Think Starship Troopers on this one.

5) The plot of Metroid: Origins will be as follows.
Imagine an all out war with an insect-like race. Space Pirates. A major offensive is organized by the Galaxy Federation Police to abolish their race and restore peace to the galaxy. They sucessfully win the battle but while they are distracted, a colony of minors is attacked and destroyed. It was a diversion! Not only is the largest source of the most precious energy source in the universe stolen, but none are thought to survive the attack - however, one little girl manages to escape. After a few days, she is found by an alien race and raised as one of their own. Infused with their blood to survive the harsh climate, she is trained to become a warrior and fitted with their advanced technology, all the while they predict their own end.

Now, it is a decade later. The space pirates have been out of the picture for some time but suspicions arise. A group of scientists is killed on a routine visit to planet Zebes, not by space pirates but by a creature from another planet, SR-388. Suddenly, the space pirates jump back into action and they want payback! The GFP lose hope as the space pirates overwhelm them when out of the distance comes a mysterious figure in a bio-tech suit, unlike any technology the Federation has ever seen before. This being unleashes a fury upon the pirates, causing them to retreat, but a dragon-like being glares on in the distance, plotting its revenge with its eyes, then flies away.

Our hero is well accepted and invited to stay aboard a GFP cruiser. "Take your suit off, stay awhile," they say but there is business to tend to. They offer money, and the hero accepts. Accompanying the armies bravest group of troopers, our hero is enlisted to help wipe out the space pirates on Zebes. Along the way they encounter Chozo warnings, familiar to our hero. We discover that our hero was that little girl that survived. We catch a glimpse of her without her suit on and she shares a moment with her commanding officer, Adam.

Eventually the team infiltrates the space pirate base and erradicates them, then are attacked by a swarm of jellyfish-like creatures. All of the troopers are brutally killed as their life is sucked right out of them, except for Adam, who is badly injured. Samus, our hero, neutralizes the threat, only to face off with the dragon-like being known as Ridley, the space pirate general. They battle it out as Adam clinges on for dear life.

The battle rages and Ridley seems invulnerable to all manner of weaponry but Adam manages to make his way to the transport. Samus gives him the go ahead to detonate its self-destruct sequence to rid the planet of Ridley and them when just in the nick of time, other bounty hunters arrive and escort the pair to safety. As one last screech is heard echoing throughout the deep caverns of Brinstar, the dropship escapes the planets atmosphere and the survivors, Samus and Adam, look upon Zebes with reflief.

Back on board the main GFP ship, the two are informed of a new discovery. They call it Aurora, a mysterious bio-mechanical being which can store immense amounts of information. Adam, however, is skeptical, and believes using this creature may somehow jeoperdize mankind.