Smoking America

I smoke a pack a day. There America, I said it.

I have been smoking for four years, not because I'm addicted (which I will admit, I AM addicted), but because I love it. I love lighting a pipe with vanilla soaked tobacco and enjoying the tingling sensation it brings to my tongue, the rich aroma of vanilla filling the air around me. I love cigarettes. I love cigars. I simply love tobacco.

Since I live in Virginia, a lot of buzz has surrounded the prospect of Anti-Smoking Legislation and how it will affect other states in our nation. In Seattle, legislation has already been passed, and there is no other sinking feeling like a cop pushing you against a wall, taking your smokes from you and calling you a "Fucking Tourist" before handing you a citation. Honestly, how is it any of anyone else's business if I smoke or not? It ISN'T any of your business.

Let's also not forget the fact that America was built off of Tobacco, in fact, it has been the leading cash crop for generations. Dare I say that abolishing smoking is Un-American? According to Wikipedia:

"Tobacco has been growing on the American continent since about 6000 BC and began being used by native cultures at about 3000 BC. It has been smoked in one form or another since about 2000 BC. There are drawings of ancient Mayans smoking cigars from about 1400 BC. Tobacco has a very long history of use in Native American culture and played an important part in the foundation of the United States of America, going back to colonial times and the original Jamestown settlement."

6000 BC! That's a long time. Another thing that bugs me is the Anti-Smoking ads on television that make smokers look like disgusting, unappealing, nasty people as opposed to people who don't smoke. I'm not a jerk, I'm a pretty nice guy but for some reason (because I smoke), I am a barbaric, fat, phlegm infested neanderthal...isn't that slander? I realize that some people don't like smoking, and want to persuade others not to, but don't make me look bad at the same time! I'm a person too, dammit!

Don't get me wrong, I don't want to force others to smoke, I want that to be their choice. I don't want people to smoke just because I do, I want them to enjoy it if they have the opportunity. I don't want to pressure people either. It's my hobby, I won't force it on you. I don't smoke in houses (not even my own), and I don't smoke around children either, because I know that they are impressionable. I enjoy smoking in private anyway.

I was in a restaurant a few weeks ago. The place was packed because it was a Friday night and the buffet was hot and delicious. 95% of the joint was non-smoking, and this tiny corner of the place was reserved for smokers, and had around eight tables in it, out of probably two-hundred tables reserved for non-smokers. The smoking section was empty, so me and my non-smoker friends sat there. About half-way through my meal, I lit up (after asking my friends if they didn't mind) and a woman sat down behind me, two tables away, then instantly got up and flagged a waiter down next to my table. She looked right into my eyes and asked the waiter if there was a non-smoking section. I was pissed! I deliberately blew smoke in her direction from across the table. Now those of you reading might think me a complete dick, however, if she had asked me nicely to put out my cigarette because the rest of the non-smoking restaurant was full, I would have gladly put it out for her. Instead, I got a dirty look and embarrassment. She deserved a face full of smoke.

If I want to smoke, that's my business, and my business alone. The government wants to restrict my right to smoke, which is total hypocrisy. A little while ago, the government was trying to figure out whether or not English could be the official language of the United States. They ultimately concluded that it couldn't, because the country is such a melting pot of cultures and races that it would alienate an entire group of people who didn't speak English...well guess what? By passing anti-smoking legislation, you've alienated an entire group of people anyway! Great job, assholes!

Let's also not forget that local bars and tobacco shops are losing business...most people in bars go to drink and smoke...if you can't smoke IN the bar, or within 50 feet of it, what's the point in going? Besides, booze is cheaper if you buy it for home consumption. Goodbye bars!

Listen, I'm not saying I want the exclusive right to blow smoke into your homes, I'm just saying I want to have the right to CHOOSE. I enjoy smoking, and I am VERY aware of the risks involved. Whether I care about those risks or not is none of your concern.