A letter to Google

Sup Googs,

Of all the letters you get, I'm sure most of them are from fans admiring how awesome Google is. The rest must be from paranoid idiots shouting about the legality of being tracked, privacy control and all manner of conspiratorial bullshittery. I don't belong to either category, but rather I'm sending this letter to give a constructive response of how to make Google a better, more user friendly place for people to conduct business.

After spending a considerable amount of time trying to figure out how to work Google sites, I have come to the conclusion that it was designed, implemented and tested by feces throwing spider monkeys. I suppose the first question I should ask is 'how the hell did this get by a QA department', or better yet, 'was this even run past a QA department?'. This shit barely works and is BY FAR the worst product Google has to offer (which is really saying something, since Google wave and Google buzz sucked so much it could take the chrome off a trailer hitch).

Want to start with a totally blank page and just put in your own html? NO. Want to get rid of the search bar, or place it elsewhere to center a header image? NO. Even creating a splash page is ridiculously difficult. These are basic things that can easily be fixed, I can't even edit the html. it's nice to offer ease of use access to those who know nothing about what they're doing and are a bazillion years old, but it makes things super difficult for people who know even a BIT about what they're doing. $10 for a domain and an easy-to-build website is enticing, I just didn't know THIS is what I was in for. Even if some of those features are there, they're ridiculously hard to find. The process is NOT easily navigable...I'm not trying to steer a trade ship through a narrow canal in the 1600s, I'm just trying to build a goddamn website.

Oh I know, everyone at Google are super geniuses and I can't argue with that, but I'll make this really easy to understand: I can't conceive that the same company that produces the best search algorithm in the world, makes billions of dollars annually, has a $600 price tag for ONE SHARE and that practically OWNS THE INTERNET made this product that, in comparison, looks like it was made out of Popsicle sticks by an eight year old girl with no hands...

Sincerely,
Chief